“On a traffic light green means ‘go’ and yellow means ‘yield’, but on a banana it’s just the opposite. Green means ‘hold on,’ yellow means ‘go ahead,’ and red means, ‘where the hell did you get that banana at?”
— Mitch Hedberg, Strategic Grill Locations : Mitch Hedberg
New year. New me?
No. Same me. Same nonsense coming out of my mouth. I have, however, made one subtle life change. I downgraded from Monster energy drinks to Rockstar. I figure if I’m still going to fight against falling asleep several times a day, I may as well spend a little less doing it. The “zero” brand has a decent taste. It’s well enough removed from the traditional energy drink flavor of gasoline mixed with Skittles that have been opened for 3 years.
I don’t get into the resolution thing. If you do, then good on you. I take a more practical approach. If I’m not doing something already, then I’m certainly not going to start doing it just because the calendar has a new number on the top. I find if you are waiting for a specific date to start something new then you don’t want to start that particular thing to begin with. Once the excitement of seeing 2019 wears off, you’ll probably look for other reasons to not do things. It’s cold. I’m tired. The clouds look scary today. That burrito is still wrecking havoc. So on and so on and so on.
Not that anyone should look for excuses! Keep doing stuff. I mean, if you want to get in shape, then do it. If you want to learn an instrument or a new language, then do it. Just find the things that truly matter. And do those things for the right reasons. Keep in mind, however, that nothing good comes easy. Changes — those ones you want to make for the good — can’t just be temporary. It never works that way. If it matters to you — if it’s truly something you want — then it’s forever. And yeah, sure, you’ll see highs and lows along the way. Probably more lows than anything at first. Change is not easy. Life adjustments are not simple and quick. The road is long and arduous and gross most of the time. And the finish line doesn’t exist. As I said, it’s forever and ever. But at some point, that road splits off from the poo poo stuff and you’ll find it’s a bit nicer moving along that way.
At what point does our generation become the ‘old man yelling at cloud’ generation? Or are we there? Millennials are freaking weird but are we much different from the generations that came before us? I’m sure in some ways, yeah. I mean, I don’t recall previous generations wanting to bring back diseases because a fake article told them that vaccines are bad.
I mean, I get it. Sure. No one likes anything. Everything is stupid. Popular stuff is garbage. Unless it was made in a garage or with a budget equivalent to the value menu at your fast food joint of choice, then said thing needs to be shunned. Cast away. And damn those many fools who don’t feel the same way.
I’d hate to be someone of importance. Or close to any sort of “fame”. The anonymous Internet warriors will lay down layers and layers of egg shells for you to walk on top of. One slip up and kaboom! You’re toast, kid. Not the warm buttery variety either — no no! It’s agree with us or feel our digital wrath! Agree with us or lose your job! Obey! Obey!
Or they’ll just bypass that and say the most horrible things. I can’t wrap my head around any of it but that might be the one that gets me the most. How can someone just sit there and be good with the world after telling someone else to kill themselves? Or unload insult after insult after insult? I’d love to see a live map of the brain when someone starts into that business. Is it gratification? Does it make them feel good? Tough? Superior? Is it a prelude to some weird sexual fetish? Do they call a celebrity ‘ugly’ and ‘fat’ and then immediately turn the browser to incest porn and fire away? You know none of those “people” have the gumption to say anything to others in real life. It’s easy to thumb away at your phone and say terrible stuff. I’m well aware that not everyone is sitting on the sunny side of the common sense tree. Believe me, I understand.
And why are we so focused on which side of the fence people are supposed to agree/disagree with? Left! Right! Well, what about the Up? the Down? the Upside Down?????
What about the mutants living in the sewers??
I say it’s all about reaction. About going “viral”. People — for the most part — don’t care about issues. They aren’t offended. They aren’t passionate about issues. They want to be noticed. They want their band of merry Internet followers to see what they “said” and, in turn, praise them for it. They want to be able to add something in their Twitter bio to make them stand out among the rest of the underground dwellers. And not, I’m not talking about the CHUDs.
People aren’t yelling at clouds. They’re yelling at one another. And in a way, they’re just yelling at themselves. Misguided fools who waste time chasing shadows and their own tails. And at the end of all of this, they’ll be left kicking at the dust. Why is that? Because everyone will stop caring. The focus will shift away from this culture and land on something else. And people will find new clouds to yell at.
I don’t know enough about the political climate in order to have a real opinion. When I see the threads of discussion and arguments, I am grateful for my ignorance. There are a lot of nicer things to do instead of arguing politics. Having a 400-pound hooker step on your genitals ranks right at the top. Of course, it doesn’t have to be that extreme. The hooker can be smaller.
The Superbowl approaches. I’ll probably watch some of it. Unless there is a hockey game on at the same time. Or even close to the same time. Okay, I just checked. Last games start at 2:00 PM. Well. There we have it. With all the drama surrounding the Steelers this season, I was almost glad to see them knocked out of the thing. I’m by no means a Pats fan but at least they are structured and disciplined. Too much ego and high school shenanigans involved with pro football. And, as we saw with the pro wrestling style finish of the Saints/Rams game, it’s become a game overly controlled by the officials. There will come a time when tackling is outlawed and every play is reviewed for the smallest of infractions.
It used to be an event worth watching for the commercials. Forget the game. Now, those same commercials are readily available on YouTube minutes after airing. Does anyone remember any really good commercials from over the years? I always remember the one from Pepsi where the little kid got sucked into the bottle on the beach. I’m sure there are a good bit of fun ones that have aired over the years. Before YouTube, you had to sit and watch the game and hope you weren’t in the bathroom when something good aired. I think the Today Show recapped them that next morning but we were in school by then.
Speaking of football, I’ve become rather interested in watching Premier League every weekend. I think it would be very cool to attend a match one of these days. I’m not overly familiar with the specifics and rules but it’s fun to watch.
I need some new music to listen to. Sharon Van Etten put out a new album last week and it’s great. I honestly can’t recall the last time I sat down and listened to something new and was totally blown away by it. Phoebe Bridgers debut album is probably the closest one. And if I have to sit and think, then chances are it just hasn’t happened.
I have been trying to play catch up with some of the movies I’ve missed over these last few months.
Suspiria (remake): Nothing like the original. Watch the original. This was different. In what way? I don’t know. The ending is bonkers.
A Star is Born (remake of a remake): I haven’t watched either of the previous entries. Enjoyed this. Big fan of Bradley Cooper. And Lady Gaga. I usually enjoy music related movies.
Hell Fest: Decent slasher movie. Worth a watch (if you like that sort of thing).
So yeah. Be good to each other. I’ll try to come up with something more interesting next time.
A Total Mess -- A Blog by Travis Ralston 